Accepting, Learning and Growing...

June 13, 2011

"What seems to us as bitter trials are often blessings in disguise" Oscar Wilde


I recently heard an interesting tale that goes something like this:

A poor and old man lived in a small town with his only son that he deeply loved and depended on. His son had always dreamed of owning a horse, and his father, after many years of hard work, was finally able to buy him a horse. The same day his son received the horse he went for a ride, but since he was new to riding and to the horse, things didn't go so well and he fell, breaking his leg.
The old man was devastated and upset, with feelings of guilt and unfairness and also worried about how he would manage to work the land if his son could not help him.
A few days passed and the army stopped by the small town, war had erupted in the country and they were drafting young men to go to war. Since the old's man son was bed ridded with a broken leg, they did not take him away, and he was able to stay with his father and eventually recovered from his broken leg.

The moral of the story: nothing is totally good or bad, we often look back at difficult times and realize that good things came out of them. In the case of the old man story, what he saw as a misfortune, ended up being a blessing, in other cases, the misfortune is there to make us reflect on something and learn from it, in order to improve our life. So in both cases, the events happen for a reason.

If we learn to accept misfortunes and believe they happen for a reason, it will only give us a sense of peace and if we are willing to reflect upon the situation, we will learn, grow, and become wiser and stronger.

The key is acceptance and trust: accept what IS and trust that there is a reason for it.
Avoid being carried away by emotions like: denial, anger, frustration, etc. Although it is natural to feel upset, by practicing real acceptance and trust, we won't let our emotions control us and we will be able to see what's really important.

I truly believe that if we can accept what comes, without judging but rather reflecting, we will come out of it stronger, better able to cope in the future, and better even: less likely to attract misfortunes in the future.

Many people tend to see every problem they face as someone else's fault, bad luck, a conspiracy against them, etc. and never look inside to reflect upon their own responsibility in the matter.
I dare not go as far as to say that we are responsible for what happens to us, but... to some extent we are.

For instance, if we take the tale above as an example, we could say that it was the old man's intuition that made him give his son the horse at that particular time, thus, protecting him from been taken away by the army.

Or, take the case (often heard) of the workaholic man that makes lots of money, works like crazy, never sees his family and almost dies of a heart attack, then, he is forced to revalue his life and decides to make a dramatic change for the better. We can also say that by abusing his body he brought the heart attack into his experience, in order to learn the lesson and understand what was really important in life.

Of course, the way we often attract misfortune to us it totally unconscious, because nobody in their right mind will want to attract something bad to them, right?
Our minds and souls work in hidden ways. However, if we are able to reflect and see the blessings or the lessons that come after such events, we will be stronger and will attract less of them in the future.

So, taking responsibility for our problems is also important, accepting this responsibility does not mean feeling guilty or angry at ourselves, but rather reflecting on why things are happening and learning from that reflection. In taking responsibility we are also empowering ourselves, because we go from being just victims to being creators of our own life.

So, after any misfortune, ask yourself: Why is this happening? What good can come from this? What can I learn from this? Is there a message for me in this?.
What is the point of growing and learning? Well, not only it will give us peace and strength to live a much happier life, but it will allow our souls to become more and more evolved.

Have a wonderful week!


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