The Skill of Detachment

June 4th, 2012

Blog Format

Lately I have been a little busy with a new project I wish to share with you.


I have fallen in love so much with writing and sharing my passion with all of you, that I have decided to take it a step further and have started to write a book... yes, it has always been a hidden dream that was buried in the back of my mind for years. I never really thought I could do it, since I am not a formal writer. But the day has come and I have started this project.

I am not sure when I will complete my book, or where it will take me, but I am enjoying the journey and I trust the outcome will be great. I am just savoring every step as it comes.

I am sharing this with you because, as my readers, you have played a key role in my decision to get started, your support and encouragement has allowed me to believe that I can indeed do this!

But I am also telling you this because I want to reflect on the meaning of "detachment".

For a long time, I have struggled with this word "detachment", and the concept that it conveys.
To me the idea of being detached from anything, meant that I did not care for it, that it did not mean anything to me, and that I was emotionally disconnected from it.

In many texts I came across, this word was often used, and every time I read it I felt uncomfortable.
How can I detach from a dream?, how can I detach from a goal?, or worse: how can I detach from a person I love...? This made no sense to me.

Now however, I have come to understand the true concept behind the word detachment, as a very different notion, that which is at the core of all spiritual texts.

In fact, detachment does not mean you don't care about a goal, a project or a person; it means you have the capacity to allow the outcome to be what it will, without fighting it, without resenting it, without judging it and without blaming anyone for it.

In this sense, detachment is a great skill, a survival skill I would add!
Since so much of our surroundings is out of our control, having the capacity to detach from an outcome or a person is a much better way to live. This does NOT mean we become cold and careless, we can still care and love as much as ever, but we are willing to accept the things that come our way, as they come, with peace.

For instance, we can have a goal, we can focus on it, we can act on it and we can trust we'll achieve it, and all of this is great, however, we also need to understand two key factors:

  • The workings of the Universe are profound and perfect, beyond our understanding, so things may not always work the way we envisioned them, or within the time frame we had hoped for. This does not mean they will not work, in fact sometimes the outcomes are much greater than we had envisioned.

  • The journey is all that matters, the goal itself is not as important as the journey towards it. It is only by fully being in the present moment that we have a chance to achieve our goals. Accepting the present, is the only way to go! We can build upon the present as opposed to resist it. Most people however, tend to resist a present situation that they don't like, and this only limits them.

By understanding these two points we can accept the idea of detachment as a way of letting go of the outcome, while still working towards it.

We can control our actions but we can't control the outcome of those actions, however, if we trust that in time, things will fall into place and that it will be "the place" we need to be in, at that particular time, we are detaching ourselves from the outcome, and our journey can be a lot more pleasurable and easy.

Never stop trusting, never stop dreaming, never stop believing, but remember that the journey is way more important than the destination!

Have a great week!


* Silva Intuition Training (for DC Metro Area residents). June 30 - July 1. For more information, call Diana at 703-866-4030 or email her at: The Silva Method is a wonderful system to improve your life in a long lasting way, I highly recommend their programs and I personally know Diana to be a wonderful teacher, mentor, friend.

* Lighten Up for Spring This is a wonderful program offered by a friend of mine, it is a do-at-your-own pace program and will help you balance your brain chemistry, clear out the junk, and begin to shift your relationship to eating and your body... so you can have more energy, more peace and more freedom to do what you love!

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